the side. “This was a mistake. I never should have accepted the job.”
Dev bent down so his face was inches from hers. “Then define it, Kiki,” he said between gritted teeth. “Tell me you never want me to fuck you again right now, and I’ll be all business from this moment on.”
Kiki lifted her chin. “I’m not going to lie to you, okay? I’d love nothing more than to be with you. But you have to stay away from me, Dev. Believe me, it’s better for both of us.”
Dev didn’t move a muscle. She stared back at him, not daring to let her chilly expression melt.
The door flung open. Kiki glanced toward it and saw Bix striding toward them with an ice pack in his hand. “You okay, buddy? I heard you took a spill. Not going to affect your guitar playing, I hope?”
Dev returned his gaze to Kiki. “I’m fine.”
“Glad to hear it,” Bix said, slapping the ice pack on Dev’s arm. “’Cause you got a hot lineup outside just dying for a piece of you.”
Kiki searched for her voice. Never mind Bix’s ill timing—her job was to look after Dev, and it was time for her to be professional. “Dev really isn’t in any shape to be meeting anyone right now.”
The smile dropped off Bix’s face. “He just said himself he’s fine. And here’s the thing—autographs make for happy fans, happy fans tell their friends, they all buy more records, and that—”
“Let them in,” Dev interrupted, his eyes still boring into Kiki’s. “Go ahead. I’m happy to meet them. And, Kiki, I’d like you to stay.”
Panic filled her chest. She’d shut him down once and for all, and now he was going to show her exactly what she was missing. As her feet stayed rooted in place, she realized she was holding her breath. This is going to be so bad.
Bix opened the door, and two burly men leading a barrage of skimpily dressed women streamed into the room. Kiki was sure they’d crush Dev completely if it weren’t for the handlers, who stood protectively in front of him and shouted for the fans to approach one at a time. The room was so small that Kiki had to practically push herself against a wall to avoid getting crushed. She tried to catch Dev’s eye as he signed autographs with his good hand and smiled for selfies, but it was as if he’d already forgotten about her. Oh, God, what have I done?
Finally, Dev stood up from his chair. A few of the pushier ladies crowded in even closer to him, cleavage and pouting lips on full display like a Discovery Channel mammalian mating ritual.
Kiki couldn’t stand it any longer. Looking for an opening in the throng, she started pressing her way toward the door. She was almost there when she heard Dev’s voice behind her.
“Thanks for coming in, ladies,” he said. “Kiki will show you out.”
She froze, meeting his eyes as the women reluctantly started filing out the door. Several of them threw her jealous glances as they left, and she couldn’t help it—she felt a surge of power. It was written all over Dev’s face—it was her he wanted. Kiki Becker, strawberry blonde, freckled, currently several pounds over her ideal weight—and he wanted her.
Even if she could never let him touch her again.
When the room was clear, Dev slowly walked toward her. Kiki watched him approach, pressing herself backward again. He stepped close enough that she could feel the heat of his body, and then there was nowhere for her to go. He placed his good hand on the wall right beside her shoulder, and then he reached up to brush a strand of hair off her face. He smiled sadly at her. Then he pushed himself off the wall and left the room.
“DID YOU SAY PARIS? You must mean the town in Texas, right?” Kiki’s father, Lawrence, chuckled over the phone.
“No, Dad, I mean the real deal,” Kiki said. Moving toward the window of her hotel room, she pulled the gauzy curtains wider to take in the nighttime view. The Eiffel Tower, lit up in the dark, was framed in the distance as perfectly as a postcard. She still couldn’t believe she was in the city she’d only ever dreamed of going to, staying at the famous Hotel George V no less. If only she could be experiencing its romance with Dev at her side instead of just in her head.
She banished the thought.
“I wish I could show it to you, Dad. Do you know what I had for lunch today? Two chocolate croissants. Well, it might have been three—”
“Three croissants, huh?” Lawrence cut in. “Is that just ‘when in Rome,’ or has something got you stressed out?”
Kiki sighed; she should have known she couldn’t get one by her father, who understood her better than anyone on earth. It was 5 p.m. back in Atlanta, and Kiki could just picture him sitting in his favorite armchair with his Time magazine and his black coffee. She could see the lines around his eyes that fanned out like rays of sunshine, the head of hair that was now fully gray. Looking at photos of him from when she was a toddler, it was hard to believe the person with the smooth skin and sandy hair holding her up like a prize was the same man. She knew her mother’s departure had aged him, even if he rarely talked about it. Lawrence Becker was a man of action more than words; when it became clear his wife wasn’t coming back, he’d simply risen to the task, doing his best to raise his only child on his own until he’d eventually remarried.
Kiki sighed. “I’m fine, Dad. My new job is...interesting. It’s just...” She paused, wondering how much she should say. Though she longed to spill her guts to someone about Dev, that was a conversation better saved for a girlfriend. But there was something else on her mind that she knew she could unload on her father. “This is a little crazy, but I found a woman who could be Mom. I haven’t reached out to her yet, but I will soon. And I guess I’m a little scared.”
Kiki knew there would be silence, but it seemed to stretch on forever. “Well. I know how important this is to you,” Lawrence replied finally. “I’ll say what I’ve always said about it—that if you find her, your life will never be the same. That’s not necessarily good or bad. Just be prepared, that’s all. She might not be what you’re expecting.”
“I know. And this woman is in Sydney, so it’s probably a dead end.” She hesitated. “Unless—unless you can think of any reason she’d end up there?” Kiki knew the question was as good as hypothetical, but she still had to ask it. Her father had always refused to say much about her mother—especially when it came to possible reasons for her leaving them—and while she admired his neutrality, she sometimes wished he’d be more forthcoming.
“Nothing comes to mind, honey. Sydney isn’t a place she ever mentioned.”
Kiki nodded resignedly. “That’s what I thought. But since I’m going to be there anyway...”
“Indeed. It’s worth a try.” When he paused, Kiki knew the subject was closed. “Deirdre will be sorry to have missed you,” Lawrence said after clearing his throat. “Why don’t I have her call you when she’s back from the library?”
“No, Dad, it’s okay. It’s almost midnight here and I have an early morning.” Kiki sank down on her bed, trying to ignore the familiar tug of guilt she always felt when it came to her stepmother.
