I put a shot in his drink. He threw up, you know. I have to give up these drinks, if only for him. By the way, would you like one?” she asked, turning around to me.
Never having liked the drink, I started to refuse, but when I looked around me, I saw every single person in the room holding a glass of the red stuff. The stewards had brought nothing else but it. Without waiting for my answer, she put a glass in my hand and pulled me over into a corner. In the background I saw big grins of relief appearing on the faces of the captain and the other officers. Thank God, somebody else was being singled out.
“What’s your name young man?”
Without even listening to the answer, she nudged even closer and started to whisper in my ear, every few seconds looking furtively behind her as if afraid somebody else would want to listen in on this privileged conversation.
“You seem to be very intelligent to me, and I have to tell you something.”
By now she held my head with both her hands, one at the nape of my neck, and the other under my lower jawbone, making me feel rather uncomfortable. I tried to move away, but Ma was surprisingly strong. The others by now were enjoying the party very much and looked at Ma en me with unconcealed delight.
“Buster is not a real man at all.” She whispered. “He is just a teddy bear! They all think he is real, you know, and I can’t bear breaking the truth to them, they are all so nice. Oh! … Look, he is waking up. He wants to get out of bed!”
Abruptly letting me go, she moved over to the bed, uncovered the bear and carried him to a chair. Buster was an early specie, his fur was all but gone and at various parts of his ancient body I saw pieces of straw stuffing sticking out.
“Well, are you not going to wish him a happy birthday?”
Ma expectantly looked at the officers huddled together in a corner of the cabin and pointed at the captain.
“You are the first one.”
With a “devil may care” look on his face, he moved over and took
Buster’s right paw in his hand and shook it vigorously.
“Congratulations, Buster.”
The other officers including me followed, and Buster took all the good wishes quietly and in good nature.
“Yes you too.”
Ma Winkler looked at the purser who so far had escaped all the attention, and who during the course of the party had focused more on the cart with Bloody Mary’s than on Buster, and who as a result was none too steady on his feet. Smiling, he abided her wish and shook Buster’s paw like we all had done. This time however the result was a little different from the previous times. Maybe it was the strong handshake of the purser, but it also could have been the result of hundreds of strong handshakes during parties like this before. Without any of us really noticing what happened, we were all startled by an anguished cry from Ma Winkler and an exclamation of surprise from the purser.
Buster’s right paw had come off at the shoulder joint, and he sadly sagged to one side of the chair.
“A doctor! Quick, do something!”
Ma Winkler hysterically pounded the captain on his chest, who not expecting such a sudden attack staggered into a corner like a boxer losing the match. It was unnerving to see the sudden change in the old lady, still banging away at the captain, her tidy hair becoming undone.
“Do something.” The captain snapped at the ship’s doctor who until now happily had followed the scene, escaping all attention. The man’s mouth dropped wide open.
“Who, me?”
“Yes you, you’re the doctor aren’t you?”
“Please help my little Buster.” Ma Winkler wailed. “He’s in pain, can’t you see that!”
It was obvious that the physician did not have enough fantasy to cope with the situation, not even after the purser had unceremoniously dropped the severed paw in his hands. By now we all started worrying if Ma wasn’t the one needing a doctor. She looked deadly pale and allowed the captain to lead her to the bed where she shakily sat down. At this moment the captain firmly took control of the situation showing the leadership only a true captain could display.
“Call the upholsterer, on the double.”
It took only a few minutes before the upholsterer arrived. He looked a little frightened at the assembled officers. None of them thought about leaving as soon as possible anymore. This party turned out to be very interesting. The little Filipino, not understanding the emotional damage he was inflicting, after he was explained what to do, stuffed the severed paw in his tote bag and carried Buster away, holding him by his leg. Ma gave a piercing scream when she saw how her little darling was being handled, but the upholsterer was gone.
It took us a while to calm her down, and shakily she had two more Bloody Marys while we, in turn, assured her that Buster would be fine. Not before long, Buster reappeared, with his front paw where it belonged. Ma Winkler pressed the upholsterer to her heaving chest and showered him with sloppy kisses.
The party lasted another ten minutes before the captain expressed his thanks to Ma and told her he was leaving, having to attend other duties. As we had come earlier that evening, we left, the captain in front, followed by his officers.
“You know what?” I heard him saying to the chief engineer. “The only normal one in that cabin this evening, was that teddy bear.”
Ma Winkler died many years ago, but every now and then, hers and Buster’s name still come up in our conversations. She was one of those passengers one does not easily forget, sometimes a pain, often a joy, and always unforgettable.
Gone Fishing
Millions of people get their life’s enjoyment out of fishing. Not me, however. It has never been a favorite hobby of mine. I have tried it often enough, and I failed to get the right taste for it. Maybe it is because I’m not a very patient man and expect to see things happening at once, and at my time. I simply don’t like sitting in a boat all day, waiting till some little fish gets it into his mind to bite. I often wonder what exactly it is that I don’t “get,” when I sometimes see hundreds of people sitting at the side of a canal, just staring at the water. All these people must love to fish and so did our captain ….
Alaska is probably one of the greatest fishing locations in the world, and fishing is one of the things everybody seems to do there. That and hunting, hiking, and just about every thing else associated with outdoor life.
We had left Ketchikan a few hours before and were on our way to Juneau. It was a beautiful late afternoon, and we sailed at full speed in an unforgettable landscape. Snow Passage, a very narrow stretch of water, requiring very careful navigation, was just an hour ahead of us. I had my binoculars ready, as this was a prime location to see some whales.
The captain was standing to my left, in deep conversation with the pilot. Of course, as always, when these two sailed together, it was all about fishing. How big a fish he had caught last week, what bait he used, and how many hooks. All of which did not appeal to me. It was probably also the reason
