father had pinned high expectations on him. Ones that Liam was still striving to meet.
Clearing her throat, Kitty said, “I need three ridden in the morning, Rodrigo. Get with Clay. He should still be here in the barn. If not—” She quickly scribbled a phone number on a scrap of paper and carried it over to the jockey. “Call him and he’ll give you the time schedule and instructions.”
Rodrigo thrust out his hand and gave Kitty’s an enthusiastic pump. “Thank you, Kitty. Thank you very much. See in you in the morning, then. Okay?”
Kitty gave him a genuine smile. “I’ll be here,” she promised.
The jockey quickly trotted off and Kitty slowly turned back to Liam.
“I think we should—” The ring of a cell phone inside her purse interrupted her in midsentence. Casting him a rueful glance, she fished out the instrument. “Sorry, Liam. Let me turn this off.”
He waited while she dealt with the phone then quickly took hold of her upper arm. “Let’s get out of here,” he muttered, “before someone else comes along.”
They left the office and walked outside to a parking area used by barn workers, trainers and their employees. Without exchanging any words, Liam helped her into the bucket seat of his plush truck.
It wasn’t until he’d driven away from the racetrack and turned onto the freeway that he felt composed enough to speak.
“I don’t understand this, Kitty. We were together six months ago! Why didn’t you—”
Her expression imploring, she looked at him. “Let’s not discuss this while we’re traveling down the freeway, Liam. I think the issue deserves more attention than that,” she said.
He suddenly realized his hands had a choke hold on the steering wheel and his breaths were coming short and fast. He had to get a grip and face this situation with sensibility, he thought. Losing his cool now would be pointless, along with making him look like a complete ass. A baby did deserve his complete attention. “All right,” he agreed. “We’ll talk over dinner.”
Thankfully, the restaurant Liam had chosen wasn’t that far from the track. In less than fifteen minutes they were inside the small eating place, seated near a window overlooking a courtyard. Darkness had fallen over the city, but foot lamps illuminated a small garden area landscaped with palms and flowering shrubs.
After the waiter left to attend to their orders, Kitty silently stared out the window. As Liam studied the lovely lines of her face, he decided the gray, gloomy weather that had moved in earlier this afternoon matched the sadness in her eyes.
Was that sadness stemming from the loss of her father or the fact that she was unexpectedly having a baby? His baby! Liam didn’t think he’d yet fully comprehended the news she’d just handed him. Yesterday he’d been a widower with nothing more than horses on his mind. Today he was going to be a father!
The idea had put his emotions on a roller-coaster ride. What if something tragic happened to her or their baby? What if something happened to rip his son or daughter away before he ever had the chance to be a father to the child, the same way it had happened seven years ago? Yet even as these fearful questions were rushing through his head, he wanted to shout with pure joy.
“I realize it’s hard for you to understand why I’ve not said anything to you about the baby before now,” she said suddenly. “But I’m not going to apologize. It wasn’t until after Dad died that I learned for sure that I was pregnant. And at that time I had other pressing things to deal with.”
Becoming a parent was a pressing thing. Or didn’t she think so? Liam wondered. He wanted to fling the question at her, but stopped himself short. Losing her father had undoubtedly turned her world upside down and now she had her pregnancy to deal with. She deserved some slack, not upbraiding. Especially from him.
Glancing around, he noticed that he and Kitty were the only two people sitting in the small alcove. The quiet coziness reminded Liam that, except for that one night they’d shared a bed, they’d hardly ever spent time alone together. And yet they were having a baby. He’d have bet the chances of that happening were less than Liam winning the Kentucky Derby.
“You’ve had one shock follow another,” he pointed out.
Her blue eyes were tinged with regret as they scanned his face. “Yes. And now I’ve given you one.” Sighing, she shook her head slightly. “Dad’s heart attack came without warning. He was always so strong and healthy. And then suddenly he was gone and my brother was away and I was faced with making funeral arrangements, watching my father being lowered into the ground and then trying to decide if I could go on with the horses. Not just Desert End horses, but those of our clients’. Without Dad, my whole world was turned upside down and I wasn’t sure I could handle the responsibility of running the farm or handling the finances. And then I found out about the baby and I wasn’t even sure I could handle being a mother.”
Her last words caused Liam to freeze inside. To think that she might have considered terminating the pregnancy chilled him to the bone. He’d already lost one child as it grew in its mother’s womb. To imagine losing a second baby was completely terrifying. He didn’t have to ponder; he already knew he wanted this child. Very much. “You mean—you considered not having the baby?”
The disbelief in his voice must have conveyed his painful thoughts because she grimaced, then once again shook her head.
“I’ve always known I would go through with this pregnancy, if that’s what you mean. But I—” Her gaze suddenly dropped to her lap. “Well, everything fell on me at once. It’s taken a while for me to come to grips and make a plan for my future—a future without Dad at my side.”
She’d had more thrown at her in a matter of days than some people had in a lifetime. Liam could understand her emotions had been thrown in upheaval. And he wasn’t here to vex her with more problems. But he did deserve answers about the baby. His baby! The reality of it continued to stun him. Since he’d lost Felicia and the baby, he’d never been able to muster any serious interest in another woman. As a result, he’d practically given up on having a family of his own. Now, in the blink of an eye, all of that had changed.
He cleared his throat, but his voice came out little more than a hoarse whisper as he spoke. “I’m grateful, Kitty, that you didn’t want to end the pregnancy.”
Her blue eyes flickered with something like relief and the sight surprised Liam. Had she expected him to be angry about her pregnancy? Or, God forbid, not want the baby? He might come across as a real bastard at times, but that was only when he was dealing with inept or uncaring stable hands. Not with the people he loved.
But he didn’t love Kitty. No. He didn’t even know her enough to love her. He liked and admired her. And he was damned attracted to her. But that was a long way from love. Besides, all of his love, his whole heart, had been buried with his wife and child. He didn’t have any left to give this woman.
“You mean you’re not upset about this?” she asked.
Liam had to admit his emotions were running the full gamut right now. Shock, fear, joy and amazement were all tumbling through him, but he could safely say that anger was not among those feelings. How could he be resentful when a child was something he’d once longed for and dreamed about?
Solemnly, he reached across the table and enfolded her hand in his. “Why would I be?”
