any spare time left to those people they already know rather than making an effort to meet new people. How will you leave this bubble to see out of this cloudy room in which you have locked yourself into? To maximise your possibilities, know what you are looking for. Strategically aim for a specific target by spending more time in places where Mr. Right may be hiding. A cultured man goes to museums and art galleries, while a religious type goes to his religious institutions. An adventurous type may go mountain climbing or bungee jumping, and the rich hang out at country clubs, expensive hotels and charity functions. The list is long.
First establish what you want, then attempt to find environments where you can meet the kind of man you want over time. It is easier to pick and choose those who fit your description. A good way to find him is through joining communities with varying interests. The internet has a number of communities based around common interests. Perhaps the best way to meet someone you find interesting is to take classes in something you are interested in. Another good tactic is to join dating sites where you can actually have a dialogue with someone to get to know them. It is much easier to communicate when you are not too concerned about being liked or about the effects of being disliked, so you are free to be more comfortable. Most those who are unconcerned with other people’s opinions are not afraid of being themselves. Not worrying about being liked can allow you to slowly gather information about him, in order to delve into his subconscious.
Bars and clubs are environments which present communication barriers such as alcohol, loud music and numerous distractions, shortening both your attention spans. These environments are not really designed for true interaction and communication, and therefore it is hard to judge him in these settings. The guy you meet in such a place may be interesting, yet due to intimidating situations or circumstances, neither of your true personalities is able to shine through. By judging or being judged too quickly, you may pass up opportunities that are staring in your face and miss the gateway that could have led to much more.
Decide on environments where you can meet men with whom you connect with culturally and emotionally. A functioning social life is good life training, where you can learn to smooth down the sharp edges, cope with and accept difference in others, tame conflicts and practice social skills. After all, you should make the most of your life. It is a good skill to be able to associate with men in whom you previously were not interested. Online communities supplement real life communities and can be switched off at your discretion.
Sometimes it is possible to have deeper conversations over the phone or in the dark before you go to sleep, as it is easier to focus on the pure content of the conversation and not constantly monitor social cues like facial expressions or gestures. When you do not see each other, there are fewer things to be aware of, which increases your comprehension level. The same dynamic can be applied to in online communication, as you are making less effort with your appearances, providing a more spontaneous exchange of ideas and experiences. The conversation is flexible making both parties become more relaxed and it can go on for any length of time. Nowadays people may be more available online than in everyday life, as they may spend most of their time in front of the screen.
How to Tell if He Is Interested
I’d have to say that’s all code for: He’s just not that into you. –Jack Berger
To become aware if you are getting to the root of his soul, look for clues that confirm his interest. Pay attention to his subconscious responses, which he is unable to control. If he is obviously trying to please or charm you, he is probably playing up to your vanity with no genuine interest in you. When he is interested, his face and gestures become more vibrant. Should you resist him, he may become more creative and motivated in overcoming your resistance. His strong desire can have an infectious impact on you.
Trust your instincts and your heart will tell you whether he is interested or not; noticing these signs is verification. When you have a deep effect on him the changes are visible. Detect the small gestures. His body language indicates how he feels more than anything he may actually say. When he is excited by your presence he may blush, stutter or his voice may tremble. He may even become tearful, laugh nervously, or adopt a relaxed persona. Darwin claimed that facial expressions are universal and part of evolution. Therefore, to divine his thoughts, imitate the expression on his face as accurately as possible and the same thoughts will arise in your mind or heart. If he holds eye contact with you longer than usual, he is probably quite interested. The guy who is interested keeps you within his field of vision, and every so often makes sure that you are still there. Another sign of interest is the size of his pupils; undiluted pupils can be a sign of disinterest.
The position of his body is a clue to his level of interest. Physically, when he is interested, he will reduce the personal space between you in comparison to the space he keeps with others, perhaps standing closer to you than to others. If he stands with his shoulders parallel to you or his feet in your direction even when standing with other people, it is a sign of attraction in his body language. If he rubs his brows with his fingers or smiles for no good reason while talking to you, it is a strong sign of interest. Fake smiles fade away very quickly.
If he finds you or your angle of conversation captivating, he will not glance in another direction. Generally, when people are deeply in love, they gaze at each other much more and are not so quick to look away. He will look longingly at things he enjoys and move his eyes away from those he does not. Unless he is naturally timid; his shyness impairs his ability to maintain good eye contact. Sometimes when you have just met and you overwhelm him, he will avoid eye contact with you, looking at everyone’s eyes but yours. On these occasions, he is probably really interested; if his feet and chest point towards you, these are sure signs that he likes you. If he is pointing at you, he is interested or at least intrigued by what you are telling him. If he is not interested or is distracted by someone else, he prepares to move his body by stepping back or turning away. The same applies to head movements; if he turns his head away from you, it signals a lack of interest either in the topic or in you. Any kind of involuntary mirroring can be a sign that he is influenced by you. His tone of voice can also tell you a lot about what he feels. Another sign is the slip of the tongue; he may say something that reveals what he is or is not interested in called the Freudian slip.
How to Gauge His Interest
We can change our lives. We can do, have, and be exactly what we wish. – Tony Robbins
First, take into consideration the strength of his effect on you. Desire cannot be faked. Look for someone who makes you uneasy or resembles your deep-rooted childhood ideal. He may represent something forbidden that excites you, maybe he resembles your ideal partner or perhaps you feel elated in his presence.
It is hard to find the right man worth attracting; it requires a combination of both your interests. Once you establish your interest, recognise if he is right for you. Analyze how he is responding to you by seeing if you have an effect on him. If he is not open to your feminine wiles, you need to stop wasting your time. It is impossible to attract every man you can put your finger on, as not everyone is open to your influence.
Many women rush through the process and become too involved too soon, without thinking rationally. When you rush into a relationship, there can be one of two outcomes: you catch him but soon lose interest, or he loses interest and the game is over. In your haste, you lose the chance of knowing if you have met the right person. Give yourself a chance to test the water to see if he is worth your time. It is only when he loses himself in the moment that he is ready to fantasise about you, and his conscience will no longer hold him back.
To attract him, you need to fully understand two things: what makes you attractive to his needs? Is he on par with what you desire? The importance of both these attributes should not be underestimated. If you act in accordance with his needs in ways not aligned with your character, he will see through your manipulations. If you rely only on
