further with the info. After they know which type they have, why continue exploring?
Respecting every step of the journey
Here’s another reason not to let other people assign you a type: One aspect of the Enneagram that appeals to me is the great respect this practice has for others. You broaden your perspective of “being other” and develop an understanding of it; and then you develop respect for the fact that everyone chooses and takes their own path, and for every development process taking its own shape and being unique. Above all, you acknowledge that each person is at a different stage of development and that none is better than the other. In my classes, I often ask the participants: “A baby is at the beginning of its life and still has to learn everything. Do you have less respect for the baby and the development stage that it’s in? Do you love the baby less because it still has to learn everything?” On the contrary. That’s exactly why humans think babies are wonderful.
Getting started
Task 1: Take an inventory of your characteristics
You already have an image of yourself — an idea of how you act in life and what your strengths and weaknesses are in your job and your relationships. The first task on this journey of discovery is to write down three of your general characteristics, as shown in Table 4-1. Then ask two people who know you well whether they also see you the same way, what they see differently, and which characteristics they would add.
TABLE 4-1: Write Down Your Characteristics
| What I See | What Person 1 Sees | What Person 2 Sees | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Characteristic | 1. | 1. | 1. |
| Characteristic | 2. | 2. | 2. |
| Characteristic | 3. | 3. | 3. |
Task 2: Recognize the archetypes
As you can read in later chapters, the Enneagram has different movements and instructors. Many of them have given names to the individual types. As a result, each type has different names in the literature. This is an attempt to express the essence of, or the most important characteristic of, a type. It can happen, of course, that different instructors each find another aspect of the type so important that they use it as a name. So the labels don’t necessarily coincide, though the descriptions mostly remain the same.
Some people may already develop an idea of their type when they recognize themselves in a certain name. You use the different names for the Enneagram types as archetypes for finding your type. In Figure 4-1, you see boxes with designations for the various types. Ask yourself these questions:
Is there one or more box in which you (strongly) recognize yourself?
Are there boxes in which you don’t recognize yourself, which you can exclude from the start?
FIGURE 4-1: Do you recognize yourself?
Task 3: Recognize that strengths are easier to see
It’s difficult to observe what your attention focuses on, especially when you’re only starting out with the Enneagram. Recognizing your strengths is much easier. The strengths of the individual Enneagram types are no accident. They originate from the focus of a type’s attention and their energy. The respective type considers these goals important and works on them. Accordingly, strengths in this area develop seemingly on their own. So the task for the self-observation is to read the nine strength descriptions in Table 4-2 and ask yourself these questions:
Is there one or more box in which you (strongly) recognize yourself?
Are there boxes in which you don’t recognize yourself and can exclude from the start?
TABLE 4-2: Do You Recognize Your Strengths?
| Strong, forceful, determined, assertive, protective of others, virtuous, truthful, clear, to the point, firm | Openhanded and eager to help, generous, romantic, sensitive, appreciative, supportive, energetic, lively, expressive, obliging, tenacious | Educated, intellectually curious, aware, deliberative, calm in the face of crisis, respectful, “live and let live,” reliable, ascetic, appreciates the simpler things, honors confidentiality |
| Honorable, careful, responsible, industrious, idealistic, independent, dedicated, makes an effort, does the right thing, holds high standards | Sensitive, empathetic, intense, passionate, idealistic, has a unique point of view, appreciates uniqueness, honors creative possibilities | Positive, inventive, imaginative, energetic, optimistic, inspiring, enthusiastic, loves life, recognizes intriguing possibilities |
| Thoughtful, warm, loyal, intuitive, sensitive, perceptive, honorable, has a good sense of humor, trusting of intimates | Quiet, adaptive, supportive, predictable, reliable, sensitive, stable, receptive, seldom judgmental, looks out for others | Efficient, goal- and solution-oriented, enthusiastic, ambitious, encouraging, practical, competent, holds strong leadership qualities |
Task 4: See what your attention is focused on
You focus your attention on what’s most important to you at an unconscious level — which might objectively be the most important. This is the unconscious driving force, or underlying motivation. It isn’t easy at first glance to detect what lies behind this force, especially not in yourself. The question, however, is how are you supposed
