This kind of passion is called “platonic love” by the Franks, in reference to Plato the philosopher; it does not exist among them in reality, being merely a term they use. Among us it is known as “ʿUdhrī love,” after ʿUdhrah, a tribe in Yemen, and not after the ʿadhrah of the slave girl, meaning her virginity and intact state as well as something else that comes from her.23 It is related of Majnūn Laylā that Laylā came to him one day and started talking to him, but he said, “Away with you! I am too busy with my love for you.” And al-Mutanabbī says in the same vein,
I was distracted from returning your greeting
And the source of my distraction was yourself.
3.2.19
واحقّ النسآ بان تُعشَق وتعزّز التى جمعت الى حسن خلقها الادب وحسن المنطق والصوت * واسعد الناس حالا من كان له حبيب يحبه كما جآ فى بعض المواليات المصرية * فانه والحالة هذه يقدم على اصعب الاعمال واعظم المساعى * ويباشرها دون ان يشعر بها * لان فكره ابدا مشغول بمحاسن حبيبه * فلو رفع صخرة فى هذه الحالة على عاتقه بل فِنْدًا لتوهم انه رافع نعال محبوبه او بالحرى رجليه * ثم انه معما يلحق المحبة من طوارى التنغيص والخيبة والحرمان وخصوصا مضض الغيرة فان عيش الخلى لا خير فيه * لان الحب يبعث على المرٓؤة والنخوة والشهامة والكرم * ويلهم المحب المعانى اللطيفة والخواطر الدقيقة * ويكسبه الاخلاق المرضية * ويستوحيه الى عمل شى عظيم يذكر به اسمه ويحمد شانه ولا سيما عند محبوبته * وقلما رايت عاشقا به جفآ وفظاظة او رثْء وبلادة او دنآءة وخساسة *
The woman most worthy of love and esteem is she who adds culture and beauty of expression and voice to beauty of appearance, and the most fortunate of persons is “a lover who’s got a lover who loves him,” as it says in an Egyptian mawāliyā. In such a state, he will be emboldened to undertake the toughest of tasks and mightiest of endeavors and, his thoughts being ever preoccupied with his beloved’s charms, will perform them as though they were nothing. In such a state, were he to shoulder a rock, or even a mighty mountain, he’d fondly suppose he was lifting his beloved’s slippers or, to be more precise, his legs. Moreover, despite all the moments of misery, disappointment, deprivation, and, above all, the torments of jealousy that accompany love, there is nothing good about the life of the fancy-free. Love stimulates manliness, pride, gallantry, and generosity. It inspires the one in love with refined ideas and nice notions. It imbues him with godly morals and makes him want to do something great for which his name will be remembered and that will bring him praise, especially from his beloved. Rarely have I met a person in love who was cold and crude, foolish and given to hebetude, or base and rude.
3.2.20
وقال بعض العَزِهين واظنه من التيتائيّين * لو لم يمنع من عشق المراة شى بعد التعفف والتورّع سوى الاضطرار الى حبّها لكفى * لان الانسان متى علم انه مسخّر لحب شى ومكلّف به ملّه بالطبع ونفر منه * قال فيكون حب المراة على هذا مغايرا للطبع * هذا اذا كان الرجل شهما عزيز النفس عالى الهمة * فاما الاوباش من الناس فلا معرفة لهم بقدر انفسهم فهم يتساقطون على حب المراة حيثما عنّت لهم وكيفما اتفق * قلت هو كلام من لم يذق الحب او من كان مفرَّكا * (١) الزحنقف الزاحف على استه *ولو سمع انثى تقول له يوما احمل يا روحى هذا الحمل من الحطب على راسك * او احبُ يا عيني على استك كالولد الصغير للبّاها حاملا وزَحَنْقَفَا(١) *
A certain abstemious person (who must, I think, have been a premature ejaculator) once said, “If the only thing—all considerations of continence and godliness aside—to prevent one from falling in love with a woman were the necessity of doing so, it would be enough, for when a person knows he is compelled and obligated to love something, he naturally finds it irksome and eschews it. It follows,” he went on, “that love of a woman is contrary to nature, though this is only if the man is perspicacious, self-respecting, and high-minded. The rabble, by contrast, have no self-respect and fall in love with women haphazardly, at the drop of a skullcap.” I say, “These are the words of one who has never tasted love, or was loathed by his wife. Had he ever heard a woman say to him,(1) zaḥanqaf (“bumping along”) is “moving over the ground on one’s backside.” ‘Bear, my darling, this load of firewood on your head’ or ‘Bump along, my sweetheart, on your backside like a little boy,’ he’d obey her in both bearing and bumping.(1)”
3.2.21
ثم ان للعشاق مذاهب مختلفة فى العشق * فمنهم من يهوى ذات التصنّع والتمويه والعجب * ومنهم من لا يعجبه ذلك وانما يوثر الحسن الطبيعى * وان يكون فى محبوبته بعض الغفلة والبلاهة * والى هذا اشار المتنبى بقوله
| حسن الحضارة مجلوب بتطرئة | وفى البداوة حسن غير مجلوب |
ومثل الاول مَثَل مَن يُقدَّم له لون من الطعام وبه قَمَه فيحتاج الى التفحية والتقتيت * ومثل الثانى مثل مَن به سْيَفنيَّة وسرْطميَّة(١)(١) سِيْفَنَّة طائر بمصر لا يقع على شجرة الا اكل جميع ورقها والسرْطم الواسع الحلق السريع البلع * فلا يمنعه عدم التفحية والتوابل من ان يلسو ويلوس ويلثَى ثم يلحس قعر الجفنة بعد فراغه منها * فاما رغبة بعض الناس فى الغفول والبلاهة فانها مبنية على ان المحب لا يزال يقترح من محبوبته اشيآ كثيرة تبعث اليها الحاجة * فمتى كانت ذات دهآ وذكآء خشى ان تملّه وتحرمه *
It is also the case that lovers follow different schools in love. Some love a woman who is all artifice, affectation, and vanity, while others do not find these things pleasing, preferring natural beauty and that their beloved should have a degree of naïveté and simplemindedness. This is what al-Mutanabbī was alluding to when
