But why they left? Did not know this Nin. Though guessed that here was not without imperious woman.
The fourth maintaining was difficult. Nina saw herself, Roman and Vika again. Now they were all together. Standing on a balcony, they looked at stars. It was quiet and peaceful in a circle. Calm and pacification. They were happy. But happiness lasted not for long. The woman departed on the sky, to stars there. Up, there, where rest and silence. The killed silence, the woman told one: – Find Natalia. – the girl exclaimed. – Mother! Do not abandon us. – but the woman could not but leave them. Its time has come. She carried out all the life tormently and sufferings, and now it is time on rest. There, in the best the world. Where there is no treachery and rage, to get also hypocrisy. Where the person is more important and that at it in a pocket. It departed in the best the world. Far away from everything that surrounded it. It departed, having left the daughter Vika on care of the father. Romana. He will always care for it, it will never leave her one. It, her father. Flesh of its flesh.
Nina woke up early. On hours was seven morning. To it, appear, that all that she saw now was really. What was it? Maintaining future? That part of the future which cannot be changed. But she can was mistaken, and all that she saw really? All these of maintaining were realistic so that it was possible to take them in all good faith. But then why it in a bed? She looked round. A bright sun of a star in a window. She got out of a bed and having thrown with a dressing gown approached a window. And here she thought. – No. It was only the dream. The dream, and nothing else is more. – She quietly sighed and her lungs were filled with fresh clean air. – yes, it was all in only a dream. Dream, and anything else. I saw the future. – here she pricked up the ears. – But why everything so ended in this dream? – here she understood. – This was my death. Death which cannot be prevented. only the idiot can consider that death it is possible to deceive. To remember only the movie by Ingmar Bergman, "the SEVENTH PRESS". The soldier, playing chess with death, tries will delay the death. But eventually loses. He understands that death cannot be beaten. Only it is possible to delay it, but when the person dies, he understands that no delay existed. Death only allowed to think that it granted this delay, but it not so. All of us die. Living, we die. Our body grows old day by day. This process is sluggish. It to last all our life. And if for us it is not prepared by destiny to die at early age, then we live to a ripe old age. Everyone dies in due time. Death inevitable part of the life of the person. In due time we will die all. Also that person who considers that he will live so long that death will just avoid him is silly.
In it t the instant, Nina felt how someone touched her shoulder and called it by name. She looked back, and saw стоящею behind her that woman whom she saw in bright sun light recently. She told: – I showed you your destiny if you decide to link life with Roman. – Nina asked. – What was it? – what that answered. – Your destiny. – Nina thought. She could not understand how to treat all these of maintaining? The first maintaining was clear, and the last too. But how to decipher two other maintaining? She did not know it. She took an interest. – I do not understand what will happen to me? – what answered with a female forfeit. – the child will bring happiness and suffering. – Nina thought. – How to understand it? – what answered with a female forfeit. – Life in suffering, here that to you waits. You are ready to it? – Nina specified. – To what? To suffering? – that answered. – Exactly. – then she added. – Sufferings is a highest degree of humility. – Nina did not understand the woman. She was not a religious person. She was an atheist rather. Without believing in anything, she always considered that suffering nothing else as a bad patch in life of the person. If the person poor was born, then he is doomed to torments and suffering. But if he was born in rich family, family of the politician, then to it nothing is terrible in this life. It in cash, and suffering to it at all. He buys everything and that cannot buy selects, being guided by the law which was created only for it. Nina asked. – Do you consider that in suffering pleasure? – that answered. – It so. – what Nina objected to. – I with you am discordant. Sufferings they are also sufferings. Nobody can understand sufferings still person will not suffer. Do you claim that I, having given birth to the child will suffer from Roman? I with it am discordant. "I will be happy. – she told. – Contrary to all I will be happy with my child, and let it will have no father, I will be happy!". On what told the female phantom. – Let's look.
Again dawn! Nina woke up from noise in the apartment. She looked round and having understood that it was only the dream. A dream, and nothing else, she was roused, and having thrown with a dressing gown, went to kitchen.
Chapter-14
Philosophy on a subject … and awful news
Again dawn! Nina woke up from noise in the apartment. She looked round and having understood that it was only the dream. A dream, and nothing else, she was roused, and having thrown with a dressing gown, went to kitchen. Roman sat at a table, he had tea. To Uvidev Ning, he greeted, and having offered tea, added. – Today solar morning, isn't that so?
Nina looked in a window. Outside the window there was an early morning. A star in a window the bright red sun. From a night hurricane there is no trace left. The trees lying on the earth only broken reminded of this awful night. Nights when across Moscow and area the hurricane flew by. Nina told.
– Fine dawn. – then she took an interest. – And where Will?
– Left early in the morning. – Roman answered. – It hurried in the airport aboard the plane.
– It is clear.
Roman offered.
– Tea?
– I will not refuse. – she sat down at a table, and Roman having got up poured tea on glasses. Nina asked. – Why?
Roman did not understand a question. It asked again.
– What why?
– Why you here? – asked Nin. – How did you find me?
– I here because wanted to see you. – Roman answered, having added. – Your sister, Natalia gave me your address. – then he asked. – By the way, where it now?
– Departed.
– Ah and. – Roman remembered. – She told something to me about departure. – he made a pause, then told. – But will be enough about it. – then he offered. – Let's talk about us.
Nina took a sip.
– About us? – she was surprised. Then she noticed. – It seems to me that we are not so well familiar to speak about us.
Roman agreed.
– I agree that we have to know well each other to speak about us.
Nina took an interest.
– What will we begin with?
Roman told about himself that he studies as the architect. He lives one with mother. However, to it was not what in general to tell about itself. He was a mother's sonny. Obeyed her in everything. Never had the opinion, and it was subject to its influence.
Nina told about herself even less. She lived together with the sister, but soon they parted. Natalia received the apartment in the center, and Nina remained in lists of people on the waiting list. For all their life they never swore always made a compromise. As for the story about her family in general, she told that she never knew them. They just in their life just were not. It was brought up by the street. She did not know what is love. Only later, when the street taught her to life, it became that Nina who was seen now by Roman.
