Share Your Dreams
Expressions
Change Your Routine
Laugh, Dance, and Sing Together
Call Them Love Names
Send Them Love Letters
Build Lots of Blanket Forts
Fly Kites Together
Lighten Up
Take Time Away
Read Books Aloud
Create a Circle of Quiet
Play Hooky Together
Walk in the Rain
Go Barefoot
Frame Their Art and Hang It on the Wall
Stay Up Late Together
Delight in Silliness
Splash a Lot
Giggle
Keep Messes in Perspective
Enjoy Dinner Together
Brag About Them
Generate Family Festivals
Thank Them for the Little Things
Esprit
Focus on the Joy They Bring
Believe in Possibilities
Open Up to the Miracle of Transformation
Remember That They Have Not Been on the Earth Very Long
Marvel at How They Are Growing
Let Them Help
Cherish the Innocence
Listen for the Spiritual Language
Build Family-Friendly Neighborhoods
Let Go When It’s Time
Let Them Come Back
Show Them Compassion and Ask for Theirs
Protect All Children
Keep Them in Your Hearts and in Your Prayers
Acknowledgments
About the Author
I don’t remember much from my childhood. At least, I don’t remember my childhood with the same clarity as my days as an active high school student or my years as a coed living in the dorms. My memories of life before age thirteen are fuzzy. Exacts and specifics elude me, and instead random, unconnected images flash occasionally in my mind like a poorly organized photo album. For example, I do remember the name of my first grade teacher, but I don’t remember who I played with at recess, where I sat in the classroom, or what I learned that year. I also remember crying in the second grade because my best friend hurt my feelings, but I can’t, no matter how hard I try, remember exactly what she did. Amid all these unclear and incomplete images, however, are a few standout events that I remember as precisely as if they happened yesterday. And there is one in particular that is my favorite.
I was eight years old and my mom and I were driving home after a day of running errands. We had had a wonderful time together going to the pharmacy, picking up the dry cleaning, and browsing the bookshop. Just before we reached our neighborhood my mom said, “I hope you and I can always have fun together.” When I asked her why we might not, she explained that sometimes mothers and daughters fought, that sometimes, as daughters grew up, mothers and daughters grew apart.
Then, with sincerity, my mom told me, “No matter what, I want us to always have a good relationship.”
Immediately I understood what my mom meant. It wasn’t that she hoped we’d never have a fight; it was much more than that. She knew we would hit rough spots in our relationship, that we wouldn’t always agree, that I wouldn’t always want her around, that running errands together on a Sunday wouldn’t always be as carefree as they were that day. What my mom meant was that she was willing to work through those difficult times, willing to fight it out, willing to give it her all to cultivate a loving mother-daughter relationship.
Watching my mother, I have learned that being a wonderful parent and developing an exceptional relationship with a child is an act of choice. I’ve often heard stressed-out mothers say to my mom, “You’re just lucky, that’s why you and your daughter get along. If you had my wild kid, you would be miserable.” Statements like these aren’t true. A person doesn’t become a good parent by chance, and a baby doesn’t become a good child by luck. My mom often repeats a quote from Jackie Kennedy Onassis: “If you bungle raising your children, I don’t think whatever else you do matters very much.” Early in her life as a parent, my mom decided that she was going to succeed. She made an aware, conscious, and thoughtful choice to make raising me, her daughter, her number one priority.
My mom has said to me, “I may have failed in many areas of my life, but in raising you I succeeded.” As her daughter, I must agree. My childhood was an absolute success! Now as I begin my adult life, my relationship with my mom continues strong, just as she’d always hoped it would.
Wonderful Ways to Love a Child is a blessing for both parents and children. The words are heartfelt, the stories are true, and the advice can help every family have a success story of their own. Wonderful Ways to Love a Child is a beautiful guide to aid parents in cultivating love, understanding, respect, and kindness in the most important relationship they will ever have—the one with their child.
—Amanda Ford
It is not enough to feel love for your child, you must be able to express your love through your actions.
Loving your child is simple and perplexing—you can’t just feel it, you’ve got to show it! Feeling love in your heart for your child is not enough—to love your baby, your toddler, your adolescent through all the stages and phases of childhood requires that you express your love through your loving actions; and, as you probably already know, it’s a lifetime commitment that requires your energy, demands lots of work, and calls you to rise above your own
