thought I would share what I am experiencing physically today, in order to help guide your prayers. I still have my hair…apparently not for long, I’m told…but my oncologist and radiology techs all seemed surprised by that. I’m okay with losing my hair, except for my grandkids. That’s a bit of a gulp for me. Would you please pray for grace around that?
I’m feeling the effects of radiation today…mild headaches, mild brain swelling/pressure, and mild nausea. I’ve learned that the effects of the radiation treatments will continue for two to three months…I’m hopeful that I won’t feel like this the whole time. That’s another area for prayer.
The lung biopsy went well, and I’ve had no complications at all. Also, in spite of the nausea, I have been able to keep eating and therefore I am able to keep my weight up. In fact I’ve gained two pounds and am feeling pleased about that.
A dear friend and mentor who has faced a cancer battle three times said to me that the hardest part of a cancer journey is what it does to the mind: fear, despair, hopelessness, etc., almost more so than what is happening to the body. As I look around the waiting room, at least in the radiation section of the clinic, that’s exactly what I see on the faces of everyone there. What a sad place! Lord, have mercy. And I confess momentary struggles in my own mind. Much prayer is needed to overcome the impact that cancer has on the mind…not just for me but for so many. How blessed I am to be able to find relief, guidance and hope in Scripture and in your prayers.
Tomorrow evening we get to meet with our church elders for prayer. I’m feeling much in need of prayer and am so grateful to our church leadership for making this happen.
Day 31—Blessed by Our Church
By Brenda Pue—January 31, 2014 7:58 a.m.
We (Jason, Kristin, Carson and I) had the joy of meeting with the leadership of our church for prayer. The Bible says, in James 5:14, “Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord” (NIV). So it’s been in my mind and heart to do this since we received the cancer diagnosis earlier this month.
We walked into the room of our pastor’s (Darrell Johnson) home, where all the leadership were gathered. Darrell led us through Scriptures, prayers and anointing with oil. The main Scripture that Darrell choose, Luke 18:35–43, was the same one that came to me two nights earlier in the darkness as I was lying awake. Profound. I will long remember this night…the faces of those amazing people, the prayers, the tears, the smiles and the incredible love in that room.
Our church has been one of the greatest blessings and expressions of care we have ever experienced. It just doesn’t get any better than this. All four of us were deeply blessed by our church. I had been thinking I might feel a bit tired after this momentous evening, but the opposite happened: I was buoyed up with energy and joy! So, we ended up having a wonderful, spontaneous double date with our kids downtown. I didn’t expect that. The whole evening felt magical to me!
Day 31—Quick Note and More Tomorrow
By Brenda Pue—February 1, 2014 12:17 a.m.
The top blessings of today came through family and a wonderful ministry friend. Today my mom and sister from Penticton arrived! My mom is moving in for a while, and my sister is here for her first instalment visit :) There is something about their presence that is “home” for me. More on that later….
And then there was the visit with our friend from Kuwait. He came in and we visited…deep, deep, deep. Then we went for a long walk together. The day was beautiful, and the conversation continued. We came back home, and he got down on his knees and prayed for us. It seems that people who minister in difficult settings seem to understand things about prayer.
Day 32—Reprieve
By Brenda Pue—February 1, 2014 11:41 p.m.
I have a week off before a few tests and meeting with two different oncologists the following week: another radiation oncologist for follow-up and a chemotherapy oncologist (I think to discuss results from the lung biopsy and a treatment plan).
Here is one specific prayer for this week. My doctor has been gradually weaning me off an anti-inflammatory medication that reduces cranial swelling but has some nasty side effects like diabetes and sleep deprivation. Today was my last dose, and I’m praying that I will respond well enough to stay off that medication. I’m hoping for some much needed rest this week.
So the gift of reprieve this week is precious to me. It’s good for me to be with my mom and sister right now. That wonderful place of knowing and being known, and being loved. That is family at its best, a place of honesty and grace. True home. I wish you could have seen my kitchen today. They decided to clean my pantry for me. I can honestly say, it has never looked that organized.
I think this is going to be a great week!
Day 33—Israel Trip
By Brenda Pue—February 2, 2014 7:58 a.m.
Today is the day that Carson and I were to leave for Israel. We were to be part of the leadership team for a tour from our church. With my cancer diagnosis on January 11th, that door was firmly closed. For some reason, this loss felt big to me, even bigger than losing my driver’s license.
So you may be able to imagine the significance of some very precious “gifts from Israel” that were given to me over the past two weeks. The first one came from our in-laws: a beautiful bottle of anointing oil from Israel. Carson uses it to pray over me every night before we go to sleep.
Three more gifts came from our long-time friend (from Toronto) who recently visited Israel and on the return flight home from the Holy Land changed his flight to Vancouver to hand deliver these gifts. The first of the three actually came via technology: a photo of my friend praying for me at the Wailing Wall. Not sure why, but I can’t look at that photo without crying. The next two gifts were hand delivered: one is a little box made of olive wood and filled with eight little wooden communion cups, one for each adult in our family; and the second is called a mezuzah. It is made of Jerusalem stone with a tiny scroll embedded into the base of it. It is to be placed at the door of a home and is a Jewish blessing for all who enter or leave.
I’m overwhelmed by generosity and kindness. Needless to say, I’m excited about following the adventures of our FBC Israel study tour!
Day 34—Good Day
By Brenda Pue—February 3, 2014 11:21 p.m.
Today was wonderful—for lots of reasons. I slept well and a lot! That just feels so good right now. I feel like I’m catching up on the past few weeks of very little sleep. Headaches (and pressure) were minimal today. I keep a medical log every day, and today’s is my best log entry. That gives me hope.
It was a beautiful sunny day, and we were able to go for a couple of long walks, both morning and afternoon. My sister cooked up a storm today, and since I happen to love eating…
The best part about today is celebrating my mom’s 80th birthday. What a gift she has been and is to me. Selfless, humble, fun, energetic, godly, woman of prayer, wise, sensible, quiet, steady and faith-filled, just to name a few of her attributes. She has blessed me enough for two lifetimes. Although we formally celebrated this milestone birthday a couple of weeks ago, it is a joy to have her be the focus today. I almost had to wrestle her to the ground
