that is quite, quite true. I had not thought of that.
[Enter Sir John and Mr. Kelvil.]
lady hunstanton
Well, Mr. Kelvil, have you got through your work?
kelvil
I have finished my writing for the day, Lady Hunstanton. It has been an arduous task. The demands on the time of a public man are very heavy now-a-days, very heavy indeed. And I don’t think they meet with adequate recognition.
·12· lady caroline
John, have you got your overshoes on?
sir john
Yes, my love.
lady caroline
I think you had better come over here, John. It is more sheltered.
sir john
I am quite comfortable, Caroline.
lady caroline
I think not, John. You had better sit beside me. [Sir John rises and goes across.]
lady stutfield
And what have you been writing about this morning, Mr. Kelvil?
kelvil
On the usual subject, Lady Stutfield. On Purity.
lady stutfield
That must be such a very, very interesting thing to write about.
·13· kelvil
It is the one subject of really national importance, now-a-days, Lady Stutfield. I purpose addressing my constituents on the question before Parliament meets. I find that the poorer classes of this country display a marked desire for a higher ethical standard.
lady stutfield
How quite, quite nice of them.
lady caroline
Are you in favour of women taking part in politics, Mr. Kettle?
sir john
Kelvil, my love, Kelvil.
kelvil
The growing influence of women is the one reassuring thing in our political life, Lady Caroline. Women are always on the side of morality, public and private.
lady stutfield
It is so very, very gratifying to hear you say that.
lady hunstanton
Ah, yes! the moral qualities in women—that is ·14· the important thing. I am afraid, Caroline, that dear Lord Illingworth doesn’t value the moral qualities in women as much as he should.
[Enter Lord Illingworth.]
lady stutfield
The world says that Lord Illingworth is very, very wicked.
lord illingworth
But what world says that, Lady Stutfield? It must be the next world. This world and I are on excellent terms. [Sits down beside Mrs. Allonby.]
lady stutfield
Every one I know says you are very, very wicked.
lord illingworth
It is perfectly monstrous the way people go about, now-a-days, saying things against one behind one’s back that are absolutely and entirely true.
lady hunstanton
Dear Lord Illingworth is quite hopeless, Lady Stutfield. I have given up trying to reform him. It would take a Public Company with a Board of Directors and a paid Secretary to do that. But you have the secretary already, Lord Illingworth, ·15· haven’t you? Gerald Arbuthnot has told us of his good fortune; it is really most kind of you.
lord illingworth
Oh, don’t say that, Lady Hunstanton. Kind is a dreadful word. I took a great fancy to young Arbuthnot the moment I met him, and he’ll be of considerable use to me in something I am foolish enough to think of doing.
lady hunstanton
He is an admirable young man. And his mother is one of my dearest friends. He has just gone for a walk with our pretty American. She is very pretty, is she not?
lady caroline
Far too pretty. These American girls carry off all the good matches. Why can’t they stay in their own country? They are always telling us it is the Paradise of women.
lord illingworth
It is, Lady Caroline. That is why, like Eve, they are so extremely anxious to get out of it.
lady caroline
Who are Miss Worsley’s parents?
·16· lord illingworth
American women are wonderfully clever in concealing their parents.
lady hunstanton
My dear Lord Illingworth, what do you mean? Miss Worsley, Caroline, is an orphan. Her father was a very wealthy millionaire, or philanthropist, or both, I believe, who entertained my son quite hospitably, when he visited Boston. I don’t know how he made his money, originally.
kelvil
I fancy in American dry goods.
lady hunstanton
What are American dry goods?
lord illingworth
American novels.
lady hunstanton
How very singular! … Well, from whatever source her large fortune came, I have a great esteem for Miss Worsley. She dresses exceedingly well. All Americans do dress well. They get their clothes in Paris.
mrs. allonby
They say, Lady Hunstanton, that when good Americans die they go to Paris.
·17· lady hunstanton
Indeed? And when bad Americans die, where do they go to?
lord illingworth
Oh, they go to America.
kelvil
I am afraid you
