and that you might be educating them to help others in future situations.
#6
Danny – who receives untrue
emails and written messages
Type: Overt – Verbal
In the space of a couple of days my world was suddenly spinning out of control.
I didn’t actually believe Cam when he said there was a love letter written by me pinned up in the canteen. I thought he was making it up. He wasn’t. It was a copy of a fake email with my name at the bottom. I scanned the contents briefly before tearing it down, scrunching it in my fist.
Later in class, I looked at it more closely.
‘Hamish – are you okay to meet in our usual spot? Don’t tell anyone – I sure won’t… x Danny.’
My first thought was to wonder why someone would do that. How many people had seen it? How long had it been up there for? I found out walking home that night.
‘Hey, Danny, can we catch up in the usual spot too?’ I didn’t even know the guy winking at me as I walked out the school gate.
‘I didn’t write that email. As if I’d put it up in the canteen for everyone to see!’ I added, angrily. But that wasn’t the worst of it.
‘Die faggot,’ I read in the first email. I opened another one. ‘We’ll get to you. Your type is always dealt with in the end.’
I tried calling Hamish a couple of times but he didn’t pick up. Surely he wasn’t behind this. I didn’t go to school the next day. I told my parents I was sick. I must have looked sick because Mum took one look at me and said that was okay. During the day I got more emails. I couldn’t help myself. I had to open them.
‘Hey, Lover Boy. Are you at home with one of your friends?’
In the space of a couple of days my world was suddenly spinning out of control. What had suddenly caused this? There had been whisperings and the odd crude remark to stir me and bait me, but they’d been one-offs. I’d just tried to ignore them and focus on the good people in my life. Like Hamish. But even he was strangely quiet. The thought of going back to school was suddenly terrifying. But I was going to have to do something.
In this situation Danny could take a step back and gain the perspective of the bigger picture.
He could visit various self-help sites to learn more about the effect of bullying and discrimination. For instance, by visiting the Australian Human Rights Commission and Mind Health Connect (see the next page), Danny will learn that equality and freedom from discrimination are fundamental human rights belonging to all people and that people have a right to be granted freedom from discrimination based on their sexual orientation or gender identity. Another site to help understand more about the effects of bullying is ReachOut (see Further Information at the end of the book).
Although beginning to understand the bigger issues, Danny still needs to return to school and deal with his friends. Certainly he felt ‘empowered’ by what he had learned, but returning to school was a big hurdle. He didn’t think he could cope with any more emails and verbal taunts.
Other strategies Danny might find useful may include blocking the senders of the emails and learning some relaxation strategies to assist him with his feelings of anxiety about coming back to school. Refer to page 132 for more information on relaxation.
The following websites are also helpful:
Their principles are based on dignity, equality and mutual respect, which are shared across cultures, religions and philosophies. They are about all people being treated fairly, treating others fairly and having the ability to make genuine choices in our daily lives.
Key points to remember
Educate yourself about bullying and its effects; this will help you understand that lots of your feelings are normal.
Block the senders of inappropriate emails.
Learn some relaxation techniques to help you with your anxiety.
If the situation doesn’t improve, you need to tell a trusted adult.
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