He ruminates about a past relationship or frequently talks about how much an ex hurt him.
He seems detached or cold.
He seems unresponsive to my feelings or needs.
He keeps himself listed on a dating app or website while dating me.
He does not introduce me to friends or family.
He excludes me from important parts of his life.
He keeps exes around and calls them all friends.
He can go for days without contacting me and is difficult to get in touch with.
He won’t spend any money on me (but spends it on himself without a problem).
He stresses that he needs a lot of “space” or time to himself.
He seems to constantly get angry at the little things.
He has a lot of difficulty articulating his feelings.
He avoids conflict or quickly shuts down during an argument.
He dismisses me easily.
He rarely asks how I’m doing (or about my day / my thoughts / my feelings).
He lacks self-confidence or gets down on himself easily.
He won’t leave anything at my place.
He won’t let me leave anything at his place.
He has said he can’t stand “needy” women (which many of his exes seem to be).
He says all his ex-girlfriends are crazy.
He avoids affection or physical intimacy (except sex).
He does not update his relationship status on social media.
His mood can change at the drop of a hat.
He avoids talking about deep or difficult topics.
He evades questions about our future.
He refuses any “relationship” talks or discussions about “us as a couple.”
His view of relationships seems unrealistic or akin to romantic fantasy.
He is selfish, self-centered, or self-absorbed.
He is hypercritical or seemingly nitpicks at a lot of things.
He has said outright that he fears commitment.
Tune in to your gut feelings about the man you are dating or are in a relationship with. If you check off a few of the following statements, then, here again, it is likely you are with someone emotionally unavailable.
I think and feel as if...
I don’t know whether I am coming or going in this relationship.
