like Stubborn Sam will keep you stuck in a cycle of getting nowhere. Becoming “real,” admitting the situation, and focusing on where you are begins recovery of any kind. To move forward in life is to have a realistic assessment of where you are.
I want you to take a minute to evaluate your life in six categories— family, job/career, finances, health, relationships, and spirituality. You can record your answers in your Amazing Life notebook.
Rate your satisfaction in these categories on a scale of 1–10 with 1 being the lowest, meaning you are not at all satisfied in this area, and 10 being the highest, meaning you are exceptionally satisfied in this area.
You will probably notice that your scores may be high in some areas and very low in others. The ones you scored lowest will be your priority areas for improvement. Your goal is to achieve an 8 or above in each category. Throughout the book, you will be provided with strategies that will help you increase your score in each of the categories.
2. Where Do I Want to Go?
Now that you have a realistic picture of how successful you do (or don’t) feel in these key areas, you can begin to identify specific areas of improvement.
The first step in identifying what you need to improve upon is to look at the six categories again and write your desired score for each category. For example, if you rated yourself a three in the finance category, what score would you like to achieve that will make you sufficiently satisfied? Next, determine as precisely as possible why you evaluated that category with the number that you did. Perhaps you rated yourself a three because you have $15,000 in debt and only $200 in savings. Determine the dollar amount that you would need to decrease your debt by and increase your savings by that would make you satisfied and thus raise your score. Repeat this same exercise for each category that needs improvement. In the end, your chart might look something like this:
| Current score | Desired score | |
| Family | 3 | 10 |
| Job/career | 4 | 8 |
| Finances | 3 | 10 |
| Health | 6 | 9 |
| Relationships | 4 | 9 |
| Spirituality | 3 | 8 |
| Reason | Goal | |
| Family | Spend only 30 minutes a day with kids | Spend at least two hours a day with them |
| Job/career | Feeling stagnant | Research new job opportunities |
| Finances | $7k debt / $200 in savings | $3.5k debt/$1,000 in savings |
| Health | 15 pounds overweight | Lose 15 pounds |
| Relationships | Hardly ever check on my siblings | Commit to calling siblings 2x/month |
| Spirituality | Spend little time on my inner self | Spend 30 minutes a day on inspirational reading, praying, meditating |
3. How Do I Get There?
Gabby didn’t like where things were in her life. She felt stuck at a deadend job, had no money in savings, had a broken relationship, hadn’t spoken to her sister in years, and felt like she didn’t have a spiritual connection to God. So much in her life seemed broken. She knew that things needed to be fixed, but where do you start when every area of your life seems to be in shambles?
If you are like Gabby, it can feel overwhelming if more than one area of your life needs improvement. The challenge of tackling so many things may seem daunting, so you circle right back to denial and make no changes at all. The trick is to develop a blueprint for success, with goals that are small, clear, and manageable. This is where you map out the directions—the planning stage. You have to write out your goals, the plan, and a timeline. Armed with a detailed plan, you will feel more empowered to tackle changes, and feel encouraged as you check off action items.
This strategy proved to be successful for Gabby. She got back on track by first admitting that she needed help and seeking guidance. When she and I met, we created a plan for her life. We focused on one area at a time, starting on strategies for her relationships. That helped to bring a sense of peace and stability. Then she was able to focus on recovery of her finances, which included setting goals for herself such as establishing a budget, updating her résumé, and following a financial plan.
Let’s go back and look at our finance example. In my scenario, you rated yourself a three because of high debt and low savings. And then you said you wanted to decrease it by $3,500. Is that a realistic number for you? It’s time to do some number crunching. Once you have an attainable figure, you can brainstorm ways to decrease that debt to reach that goal. These ways are called action steps. One such step would be that you can cut your spending, another might be that you also need to consider ways to make additional money—a part-time job or a side business. Chapter 11 is dedicated to helping you unblock money flow and create additional income, but you can begin now to make a specific plan (your action steps) for decreasing your debt if that’s in your financial category. For example, continuing with the earlier scenario, your debt is at $7,000 and you want to get down to half that plus increase your savings from $200 to $1,000. Following these four suggested steps will give you a year to meet this goal:
Step 1. Cut extra spending. Considering a family of three or four, here are some examples of things you might cut:
1 Cable—$640 yearly (opt for watching movies on DVDs that you check out for free at the library and read your news online—and watch the savings accumulate)
2 Starbucks—$440 yearly (skipping a latte twice a week adds up)
3 Eating out—$1,920 yearly (eat at home four more days a month and your family could save a bundle each year)
4 Membership/Association—fees $200 yearly (taking a break from memberships that aren’t essential means more money in the bank)
You are just on step one and have already saved $3,200—that’s only $300 away from the amount you wanted to pay off on your debt. To pay off your desired $3,500 and also increase your savings by $800, you still have $1,100 to go.
Step 2. Increase your monthly income (see Chapter 11 for ways to do this). To make up the remaining $1,100, you only need to make about $150 gross per month, but if you make more than that, say $450 a month (roughly an extra $100 a week), you would have almost all of your $7,000 in debt paid off as well, even with taxes and a tithe or donation to charity figured into the equation.
Step 3. As you begin to save and make money each month from these expense cuts and additional income, start paying it toward your credit card and putting some aside in savings as well so that you reach your goals in both categories by the end of the year.
Step 4. Once your debt is all paid off, continue to put aside money each month in savings so that next time an unexpected expense comes your way, you can pay in cash rather than going in debt again.
As you can see, this process is extensive, but it’s imperative if you plan to make changes in your life and raise your satisfaction score. Repeat this process for each category, making goals and then action steps. By the time you finish, you will have built a systematic process for reaching all of your goals.
Setting
