Questions
I would like for you to ask yourself three questions:
1 Am I happy with my life?
2 Am I reaching my potential?
3 Am I making a difference?
I refer to these three questions as life-gauging queries. Gauges on a car show measurements. For example, the gas gauge shows if your tank is full, half full, almost empty, etc. In order to have an amazing life, you want your happiness, potential, and make-adifference gauges to be on “full.” So think of these questions like checking the fluids and the air pressure in the tires before you hit the road. But, since this is your personal journey, and not a car trip, the levels should be rising rather than declining as you get closer and closer to your destination—your amazing life. Every few months pose these queries to yourself. If the answer is “no” to any question, or the level has dropped from your previous check-up, then you need to make some necessary adjustments to get yourself back on a course where you feel you are making the most of life.
Take some time now to reflect on the answers to these three questions and record your responses in your journal.
Set Your Mind on Success
If you live in a large city, you’re probably familiar with high-occupancy vehicle lanes (HOV). These HOV lanes were developed to increase average vehicle occupancy with the goal of reducing traffic congestion and air pollution. I remember moving to Dallas and being a part of the hundreds of cars that were sitting on the freeway stuck in traffic on a regular basis. Meanwhile, there was one lane—the HOV lane—where all of the cars were driving with lightning speed. They were moving toward their destination, while those of us stuck in traffic in the other lanes watched them zoom by. To use our life journey metaphor: these people were zooming by in the “success lane,” and that was enabling them to get to their destination on time. They also exercised the foresight to get in the lane in the first place by making sure they had the minimum number of passengers required and keeping alert for the limited number of entrances into the lane. They were also aware of exactly where to exit. (I have seen people try to jump into the lane at the last minute, but it’s dangerous and comes with a hefty fine.) The HOV lane is for people who know where they’re going and want to get there quickly. Does that sound like you? Are you prepared for success?
In order to be successful in your life, you have to make the decision to be successful. Decide that you want to be successful, and then act on that decision. In every area of your life that you want to make a change, you have to decide that you want to make a change. The key is in making the decision. When you commit to the decision, every fiber of your being will align itself with that decision. I’m sure you’re thinking, It can’t really be that simple or everybody would be successful. After all, you may know someone who has said they want to be successful but they’re not. But saying and doing are not the same things. It’s important, at this point in our discussion, to explain to you where success starts—it begins in your mind.
Let’s look at Chris. He had been battling with his weight since he was in elementary school. By the time he was in high school, his doctor classified him as obese. As he grew into young adulthood, his excessive weight even got in the way of attending college. As he approached thirty he begin to realize that he may never find the girl of his dreams because it was hard for people to see beyond his weight. He had tried many diets and weight-loss plans, but they were never successful for him. Finally he reached his breaking point, and decided that he was going to lose the weight no matter what it took. His mind was made up. And, because this time was the real deal, his body began to respond. Chris lost seventy pounds that year. He looks and feels great.
To help you understand this phenomenon, I want to explain to you how the body and mind work together. First, we will take a brief look at your brain. While there are many parts to your brain, we will only focus on the two that are relevant to this chapter. The most familiar and the most talked about portion of the brain is the cerebrum, which is the largest part of the brain. It’s associated with conscious thought, movement, and sensation. It consists of two halves, each controlling a side of the body. The halves are connected by the corpus callosum, which delivers messages between them. The other part that I want to emphasize is the hypothalamus, which is the master gland and is instrumental in regulating drivers and emotions. When you have a thought, it generates from your cerebrum. It’s then transferred to your hypothalamus, which prompts your actions. Think of it in this way: when you make a decision, your brain tells your body to form an assembly line to get the job done. This is just another way of saying that your body aligns itself with your thoughts. If you truly want to succeed, your body will do everything possible to help you get there.
Have you made up your mind? Have you decided that you truly want to change your life? If so, your body is waiting for its marching orders. It will do what is necessary to align itself in support of your decision. This requires some action steps that will be discussed in the following chapters. Your commitment to yourself begins with a signed contract. You can duplicate the writing below in your notebook, or go on to my Web site (www.creatingamazinglives.com) to download a copy.
Success Contract
I, __________________, on this, the __________________ day of, __________________, 20 ___, am making a declaration that I am in the driver’s seat of my life. I am ready to take control of my thoughts, actions, and success. I have made a decision that I am ready to create an amazing life for myself. By signing this contract, I am in agreement with myself that I will do everything within my power to make a deliberate effort to be healthy in mind, body, and spirit. I understand that by doing so will result in success in every area of my life. I am truly ready to create an amazing life.
Destiny-Defining Questions
As I mentioned before, in order to be successful, you must be very clear about what you want from life. These next three questions will help you create your own personal success system. Don’t be fooled by the simplicity of the questions. It’s how you answer them that will help you to determine your success. After you’ve looked at a question, write your answers in your Amazing Life notebook.
1. Where Am I?
This is the time to check in and find out exactly where you are on your journey. If you’ve ever looked at a mall directory, one of the first things you see is the big red arrow pointing to the spot that says “You are here!” Seeing exactly where you are helps you orientate yourself and know how far away you are from your destination. As I shared earlier, I had to evaluate just where I was after my twenty-year marriage ended in a divorce. I examined my life on an emotional, financial, spiritual, and physical level. I have to admit that things did not look good. When I took a hard look at where I was, I had to hold back the tears and practice my stress-breathing techniques. Nothing could have prepared me for the emotional depletion that was taking place in my body as I stared at the hard cold facts in front of me.
Perhaps you find it difficult to face your current state, but in order to move forward, you have to be prepared to confront the truth of your situation, whatever it may be. We all know people who prefer to live in a state of ignorance than acknowledge the fact that their finances or lives are in shambles. Maybe it’s your brother who spends money on electronic gadgets and then borrows money from you to pay his bills. Maybe your friend is in an unhealthy relationship yet claims that she’s okay because she sees nothing wrong. It may be your husband who refuses to open an unpaid bill, almost convincing himself that if he doesn’t
