let our kids get down and dirty more often.
Of course, it also helps to minimize the mess to begin with. We do, after all, have other things to do in our day. Here are some practical tips to minimize mess:
• Designate a craft table and make it accessible—My kids had a craft table but they never used it. Instead, they staked claim on the dining room table for projects; thus, mealtimes began with the added inconvenience of tidying it up (or at least shoving things to the side). Why didn’t they use the craft table? I surmised that the problem was twofold: 1) it wasn’t big enough for both of them to use at the same time (I believe they secretly like to be near each other all the time, despite a façade to the contrary) and 2) it was in their bedroom, away from the main activity of the house where they like to be. We got a larger table for them to work on and moved it to a more central location. While we still needed to tidy it from time to time (lest they revert to the dining room table), we were able to do so at our own convenience rather than at every mealtime.
• Use drop cloths, newspaper, or paper bags—As obvious as it may seem to suggest using such things as drop cloths or newspaper to catch a mess, you wouldn’t believe the number of times I’ve found myself scrubbing the coffee table while muttering to myself: “Next time I have to put down wax paper before they start clay projects.” Throw a sheet over the dining room table or onto the floor. Afterward, toss it into the washing machine. Or, use old newspapers. For smaller, drippy, gooey, or glittery projects, provide a paper plate on which to work. Not only will this protect the work surface and contain the mess, but also it will make the project easier to move.
• Invest in bins or baskets—Bins, craft containers, folders, or baskets into which to throw materials make cleanup much easier. It’s easier for the kids to help if you don’t worry about organizing the bins themselves. Throw all the paints and brushes into one. Put all the stickers, glue, and scissors in another. Markers and pencils in yet another. Snap, stack, and done.
• Bring out the vacuum!—The vacuum cleaner can be your best friend.
My kids think that they hit the jackpot when they discover colored sand in the craft cupboard. I let out an audible groan. I don’t want to deal with the mess that I know it will make. I am about to say “No” when I realize . . . there actually couldn’t be an easier mess to clean up. “No problem!” I say, delighted by my revelation. “When you’re done, here’s the vacuum.” Weeks later, they want to break up Styrofoam. No problem! “When you’re done, vacuum it up.” Another day, it was cutting tiny pieces of felt for no apparent reason. “Looks like fun! There’s the vacuum for when you’re done.”
• Move the project outside—While moving a project outside can make it more expansive and messier, by the same token it doesn’t matter quite as much. Hosing down grass, sidewalks, or your kids is a lot easier (and more fun) than scrubbing floors and tables. Alternatively, move the project to the bathroom. Painting, shaving foam, and other ooey-gooey activities that are safe to wash down the drain can be done right in the bath or shower.
• Make available only those materials that you want to deal with at a moment’s notice—My kids have access to most art materials. I like them to be inspired by what they find, and I also like them to be relatively self-sufficient with their projects. It promotes independence and saves me from having to find whatever they need. That said, I also keep certain materials out of reach. Paint and loose glitter, for example, are accessible only to grown-up hands. Because of their mess factor, potential for overuse, and labor intensiveness, these are projects that I want to know about before my kids start them.
Make cleanup and care for materials a habit. We all fall into the bad habit of cleaning up messes for our kids. It gets too late. It’s easier (and faster) if we just do it ourselves. You know the reasons. I use them, too. Making cleanup a habit (even for children as young as two or three years old), however, sets up a healthy habit for years to come. Here are some tips:
• Help your kids clean up—Shouting “Make sure to clean up!” from the other room is rarely effective. I know. I’ve tried. Working together is not only motivating. It also reinforces the important feeling of being a team.
• Think small, specific tasks—Kids (even teens) need large tasks to be broken into small, specific tasks. “Clean up” is a confusing and overwhelming concept. “Put all the stickers in this box, first” is doable. Think of it as running a marathon. It’s much easier to run from the end of one block to the next until you’ve finished the distance than it is to set out focusing on the entire, overwhelmingly large distance ahead.
• Make it fun—Sing. Race the clock. Race each other. Let them do the spraying and vacuuming. For younger children, encourage them to load up materials in their toy trucks and drive them where they need to go. For teens, turn up their favorite energizing tunes. Cleanup need not be a chore.
• Teach natural consequences—Let them know that leaving the lid off clay or caps off markers will dry out those materials. Point out that unwashed brushes will get too hard to use again and will need to be tossed. Papers left on the floor will accidently get stepped on and crumpled.
• Involve your child in problem solving—Instead of “time to clean up,” ask your child specific questions that require putting on his thinking cap: “Okay, where should we put your picture to dry? What should we do about these brushes? Where should we put these strips of fabric?” and so forth.
DESTRUCTION
Just a few weeks before our final session together, Christopher begins dismantling the structure on which he has worked so hard during his year in therapy with me. He tears off the toilet paper roll chimney, detaches the cardboard roof, and rips off the button and string that serve as a secure latch for the door. As he removes each piece, he places it back in the supply bin from where he originally got it. A colleague surmises either that the destruction represents his anger about the upcoming goodbye or that he doesn’t trust me to keep his structure safe after he leaves. Another hypothesizes that he wants to destroy the memory of our time together, to make goodbye more tolerable. The following week, I watch and narrate as the destruction continues. I comment only on what I see, rather than making assumptions or judgments (see also appendix 1: “Guidelines for Talking about Art and Life”). I remark: “I see you’re taking it all apart and then putting the pieces back from where you got them.” He looks up at me, “Yes. That way you have them to help the next child, just like you helped me.” Christopher isn’t angry. In fact, he isn’t destroying anything at all. He is acknowledging his own healing and paying it forward.
When we think about art, we think about making stuff. Rarely do we think about dismantling or destruction. We smile at the thought of our children drawing pictures (not scribbling over them), manipulating pipe cleaners into flowers (not chopping them into hundreds of pieces), and playing rhythms (not banging as loud and hard as possible). When we get handed an “I love you” drawing, we respond with: “Ahhhh.” Drawings of buildings exploding get an: “Ohhhh.” When we see something that looks like destruction, either during or after the creative process, we may jump to negative conclusions and unnecessarily cut the expression short. We may also miss the opportunity to explore the meaning behind the action.
Sometimes what looks like destruction isn’t at all destructive. It is productive. This section examines the productive nature of destruction in children’s art. We’ll look at how we can better understand, discuss, and embrace the scribbles, scrunches, and explosions that are part of art and, metaphorically speaking, life.
Mess-ups and meltdowns
My son expects a lot of himself. He hates it when he forms his numbers and letters
